For years, I’ve only put nail polish on my toes. In my mid teens, when I might have got into the habit of colourful finger nails, I was painting with oils… turpentine is no manicure’s friend. I also cleaned for a job, on and off, and even gloved, my nails had a pretty rough time of it.
Of course, painted nails chip and mar and break. No reason not to paint ’em in the first place. Well, for me it was enough. I’d do my toes and wear jandals for three or four months of the year, so they weren’t always protected. I’m not generally a perfectionist. I live in bit of a mess. I work, pretty well, surrounded by chaos. But I am (or was?) horribly self conscious.
There is one line in ‘Olivia Joules and the Overactive Imagination’ (by Helen Fielding of Bridget Jones fame…) which I wish I could well and truly get through my head:
No one is thinking about you. They’re all thinking about themselves, just like you.
Chipped or not, fingernails are one of those things that no one else will ever notice as much as you do. But, you know what, I’m done. Go ahead and notice. Or not. Whatever. I like having colourful digits. It’s fun and cheap, as far as cosmetics go. It’s playful and pretty and there’s joy to be had, so why the hell not?
Yesterday at the ludotheque, Louis went for the dress-ups. He’s never shown much interest in them before, but yesterday he was a lion (with a dragon’s body, initially), a magician, a princess and a knight.
Elena couldn’t be cajoled into wearing more than (very briefly) a hat, or ears.
What’s with that look? Made for the stage.
(Surely too young to be so Judgey McJudgey Face.)
Kid’s got a great roar.
(Sorry to everyone else at the Antony ludotheque…)
I’ve never been much good at costumes. Okay, I’m downright terrible. I’m always more worried about looking good, than looking like something/someone else. I under-dress and over-reach and just look silly, basically. But I think (hope) I’m getting less self-conscious, as I get older. Maybe I’ll do a good costume, yet.
I turn 29 in a couple of days, so it’s the week for thinking about growing up.
And not growing up too much for multi-coloured nails. Or dress-ups.