We have a kind of routine at our house. Today started ‘en forme’ and then this afternoon neither of the kids would sleep. All afternoon. That’s a long afternoon. Not that I don’t love hanging out with my babies, but they’re less and less fun the more tired they get.

I feel like I achieved nothing, and I suspect this is only because my plan went out the window. I achieved plenty: laundry, emails, filing, a yummy, nutritious lunch, a visit to the park and lots of cuddles with Elena.

I didn’t write in the morning because I’d left my notebook in Louis’ buggy… in his room where he was napping. Usually this wouldn’t stop me but I was in the middle of writing a conversation and uncertain exactly how it would play out. It’s a pivotal scene and I’m at one of those points where I can’t just jump ahead to the next scene.

And then when I got to writing this afternoon the conversation played out quite differently to what I had in mind… and now I don’t know what’s going on. I’m off the plan. Perhaps not permanently, but for now.

Louis was awake, while I was writing, so I was up and down a lot. Perhaps I should write it again. My characters are in the middle of a conversation that may, or may not as it turns out, change their relationship.

Hoping for inspiration in the fresh air, I took my journal with me when i took Louis to the playground. Unfortunately there were no other kids around so he got bored quickly. I managed to write (poor neglected Louis) a bit which I’m now realising could replace the bit I wrote at home, or it could go after, or the bit I wrote at home could go after. The morning after, perhaps… 😉

(the wink is easy, but how do you emoticon a nudge?)

I’ve got Louis eating baguette and watching men’s gymnastics on tv.

He’s so tired. He put his head down on the tray and when he sat up he had a piece of baguette stuck to his forehead.

(One of the first words I learned in French is ‘mignon’ or cute.)

Elena is sitting with me…

I’m typing one-handed. Slow. I’m resisting the pain au chocolat urge, though Luuk’s getting groceries on the way home so could be a while. Perhaps I should give in now. Less likely to spoil my dinner.

This parenting gig is a good lesson in letting go of control. I feel like a very slow learner.